Pre-Mommy Delusions

I'll admit it. I had preconceived notions on how some aspects of parenting would be. No matter what I read in books, I just couldn't imagine the reality of some things.

For instance, feeding a baby from a spoon. My delusion: Soft music would play in the background as the baby would sit perfectly still, totally engaged in being fed, willingly opening their mouth wide enough, with their hands quietly resting in their laps, NOT blowing a mouth full of squashed peas all over you because they just learned to do that and think it is hilarious.

The reality: The TV blaring in the background as the baby wiggles and squirms, trying to look everywhere but at you, dodging the spoon at every turn, trying to bat your hand or the spoon or the container of food, not at all interested in the process OR opening her mouth for more than a nano second, an opportunity which of course you miss because you are picking up the container of food that has spilled all over the floor because you didn't expect your sweet little Jackie Chan to karate kick it out of your ill-prepared hands.